Serrated Jaws | Need To Get A Nice Supply Of Parts?
Speaking of carnitas. I love the street tacos. Have you ever had street tacos be right? Hmm? Sounds like you’re eating street tacos right now. What’s going on? No, I have not. You have not about street taco? No. [inaudible] Speedy’s Oh, you guys know how picked, so they, they’d chop the Carney dispel. I know it is pork. I mean, I’ve tried. It will say I’ve tried it with Sereda. They chop it with Serrated Jaws. We sell them to Speedy’s. They chop it with Serrated Jaws. You’ve never had those? Have you ever had those? I have. What’d you, what do you think about those street tacos that are topless or did Serrated Jaws? I’m hungry now. Oh, Ooh, nice. I loved it. Especially with some of the salsa Verdi very day. Yeah. Watch. Watch it. Oh, why don’t we go to Tijuana as after this? We could, but they don’t shop there. Pork Wissota John’s unbelieve it. Yeah.
Do you get the caramelized onions on your, I do, yeah. and bacon. Bacon. Okay. So really [inaudible] bell peppers, onions. so Brandon at T Awanas do they have anything worth going to Tijuana? Like ever? Do you like T? I want to ever want to just talk about stuff. Got nice cold beer. You didn’t get my joke. Did you? Tijuana like do you want to but Tijuana, I do want to, I don’t want to make out with you and didn’t know what his joke was. He says, Oh, I was looking at Brandon hoping he knew what it was. We’re going to start over. Tiawana ever want to talk about the football games?
That’s where you come in, Brandon. You still help him get the joke? Alright. Okay, next one. Just thinking about Tijuana was right now, right? All right. No response. Everybody. I’m going to say a word. Should we do it? Yeah, we should say w. yeah, we’re, we’re, we’re going to play the game. It’s called the [inaudible] jog game. Okay. [inaudible] so I am.
Is that what the game is called? [inaudible] time. Anytime. Yep. Okay. Ready on three. We’re going to do it one more time together. Brendan, do you do the high part? You ready? Nays you do the middle part. I’ll do the low part. Brandon, can you do the high bar? [inaudible] have you ever seen Michael Jackson do the high Barnes? Do you know what he does get high? Was that you ever, you ever, you ever seen how he gets that high [inaudible] no. Okay. Well I know how it gets at high. You do the low part, but it’s better be a load then I’ll do the high part. You ready? It’s called the in time, right? Yep. This is, this is new. Okay. This is live. You ready? This is alive. Okay. You ready? Yup. One do three. Oh, you guys, first of all, you guys were both the same light pitch of lowness. I believe it. Try it again. Okay. This is the, I’m time game. Brandon. You ready? Do you guys just do it? No, no, no, no, no. I’m going to say a word. You come up with the story and it has to do with sorority Jones.
Okay.
Fingernail Clippers
and go.
Okay, nice. We’re going to have to throw it over to you here. Let’s do a, let’s do a basketball. Basketball. Oh, okay. That’s hard. Um, so in 1990, that’s when I started playing basketball and uh, how’s about seven years old? And uh, somebody bet me 100 bucks. I could not POM and basketball. And you know what Brandon, I was able to Palm it cause I had raided Joel’s band. Seven years old. Boom. Bam. Wow. You bring rain for this. Pretty impressive. I’ve been ready. Tiny toes. That’s your word. Let’s do this. Self-defense. Sorry. Two jobs. You have to come up with a story bro. Oh, self-defense. You have to apply self-defense in this story and you have to say SRE to Johnson.
[inaudible]
okay, I’m going to do the story for Brandon. Um, one time, one time in high school, Brandon, he uh, he had a girlfriend. This is when he had all of his teeth. He had a girlfriend his whole life ahead of him. He wasn’t bearded yet, but he did have his whole life ahead of him and all of his teeth and he went over to this girl’s house and some dude punched him in the face, right? [inaudible] that happened. Yes. We have pictures to prove it. Was it over a girl or guy, and you’ve got to answer the question. If I’m telling your story, you have to answer a girl punched you [inaudible] a guy did it guy? Yeah. Okay. Between the legs in the car. Nitos [inaudible] Nope, not not in the pork. Pork butt I’ve ever had pulled pork, but one more time. That’s good. Anyways, after that incident, Brandon was very insecure, so he took a self defense class. Now after paying several hundred dollars of self-defense training, what it came down to was that if you carried this one weapon, that not only could he gain his confidence back
and that any girl in the world would date him again and that he would be handsome and that he could not, he could grow a beard. It’d be carried this weapon. Right? And nobody would mess with him. You know what it was, Brendan [inaudible] guess I need, I need you to guess, right? I need you to guess. Stop playing with whatever you’re playing with right now. What did, what is it? Brandon is rated Joe. Are you saying if I had cerated jaws that yeah, I think so. That you would be confident and that you could get any girl that you wanted. Is that true or false? The story happened that he’s supposed to be fictional or are you talking past tense? Are you talking today? No, this was, this was a story back in the past that happened to you. I was 18 yeah, you’re not 18 anymore, so that would be the future. You’re almost 40 damn. Yeah. Time flies, flies when you have Serrated Jaws. So if you have serrated jaws, it’s kind of like Samson, not Bible kinda. You have all power. You’re all knowing. You have a supernatural power. I won’t put four in my pocket.
Why would you put them in your pocket? Who doesn’t? I put them in my back pocket. I do back in front. Makes my butt look big. I like it. Alright, next word. All right. This is going to be for Jordan. Oh, well watermelon. Well, there was this one where, Oh man, we had this recession and uh, we live on a farm and so we weren’t machining very much. So me and NACE and dad, we started planting
crops. We had some okra, okra, we had some number cucumbers. We had some zucchini, yellow squash, some corn, tomatoes, tomatoes, tomatoes, tomatoes, watermelons, jalapenos. Did you say onions? Nope. Onions. Jalapenos, bell peppers. Anyways, me and NACE would wake up every morning and we’d go pick these vegetables. Right. And we turned one of the rooms into our shop into a pretty much an icebox. Yep. Yeah. It was cold in there. And we’d sell these vegetables, organic vegetables. Right. And uh, man, these things were so hard to pick. You’d start rubbing your hand draw. Say that so again, so hard. We’re all okay. Keynotes. So anyways, one meat one day. I mean, they just got this idea to create this product and we’re like, this is a universal product that you can be used for universally. Anything to cut stuff, to hold stuff. Self-defense, camping, starting fires. I was just thought of a story. No, but do you know what it was? Do you know how I cut the watermelons from their vine? That’s right. It does. They’re rated jobs. I like that. The door, man. Was it true? Yes, it was actually [inaudible] what’s your story? Brandon? [inaudible] this would be, Jordan was involved in this, what’s the key word? I don’t know where this is going to go. Self-defense here. Okay. Self-defense. Oh, I know where I was going to go. I remember now. It was at a football game.
It was a football game actually. Yeah. A big SPI Spartan football game. How old were we? Oh man. Uh,
wow.
Let’s say a somewhere between five and however old ninth graders are usually. Yeah. Seventh grade. Yeah. Seven. 14. So I’ve known Brandon since we were half. You’re me. You’re like, I think we’ve known each other since we were babies, Brandon, right? Yes. You used to change my diaper. We used to change each other. We were advanced. Hmm. Anyways, go on. And you know, I mean, this guy got to [inaudible]. I remember. So I’m standing on top of this light. The ramp. [inaudible] there’s a whole crowd gathering around, right? Kinda. Yeah. Never heard of seventh graders or what does the grow? I believe you should get picked on. Yeah. Yeah. Brandon, Brandon’s Brandon’s a night.
And, uh, do you remember what happened? Me and him got into it kind of, and then you showed up was right. A job. That’s right. I did say eat junk. You know what the night didn’t even end up with the girl. The guy with this raided Johnston, the girl, right. Brando. And that’s what happened. That’s a good story. Yeah. Yeah. You were way better looking back then. What? Than me. Oh yeah. Well I still am. But you’ve gotten better. Listen, you got a beard now can hide that phase. I think he has a crush on you. Jealousy. Cause you come to them all shapes and sizes. The beginning of this podcast, he knows how much chest hair you have before you shave it with Serrated Jaws and I’m your brother. I don’t even know what that, Oh, Oh, he has a crush on me. I was like, I don’t know how much Chester he has.
He doesn’t have any, he shaved it. Oh, how do you know? You told me this is true. Uh, no. Open the Pepsi up. Hurry. Come on. Hey, I got some Serrated Jaws. You want to use it to open your Pepsi? Yes. Okay, here you go. Okay. Story time. Ooh, so I have a good story. Anybody want to hear it? Absolutely involves the three of us. Got us excited. Guess what state a Wichita. Wichita. Nope. Brayden. What state do you think the story in PLAs to Chicago? Nope. Oh, Oklahoma key West? Nope. Oh dang. Way back. Way, way back. [inaudible] Zuri. Yes. Oh, way back. Ooh. So we used to go to church camp with dad and dad’s whole goal. We were at church camp. He was a sponsor, but his whole goal was to hurt you on the Lake with the inner tubes. Oh, normal people like take a quarters and and sling you like what?
10 miles an hour. I remember this. God’s going like max or before, like the SS is are out. I’ve seen sparkles. I will. I do remember, I remember, I remember being on the tube would Brando now normally you ride side by side, right? Yup. Yes. I’m innovative. Just like jaws, super facade, just like just like serrated jaws. So what I do, I have top hopped up and I wrote on like a cowboy. I did write him like a cowboy and we didn’t fall cause you on time for a long time. You held on we blow hard. I had water in my eyelids for days. But you guys were holding him like straight a Joel’s yeah they don’t let go. Nope. You know why dad? I feel like dad tried it. That was a perfect place. Cause you’re at church camp cause you’re saved, you die, you’re safe, you get revived. It can’t remember. I’m pretty sure my pants came off. They did. I remember the I S you let go cause Jordan was riding you like a cowboy. I think I pants fell off and you went, he fell in the water cause I was, I was on your back. Right. So I was leaning inside the song. It was like almost like bareback from right now. Remember I was holding on lights are ready to jaws do right. It was kinda like broke back mountain bear mountain bareback.
Brandon had long hair. I was all known as long hair and his body, his body move. It was super silky. Like the finish of our Joel’s yeah. You probably see your reflection. Joe’s your reflection. It got very, you know, like when you WD 40, those jaws, they get very slick. Borderline inappropriate. Yeah. Brandon was very slick now when we went on that corner, cause why he did was like, uh, like three weeks in a row. Like we’re going like a hundred miles an hour. Right. Unbelievable. Yeah. You were screaming because you thought you’re gonna die now. When was the only time you can cuss now Brandon let go.
When Brandon let go, I’m holding on the Brandon, so I went where Brandon rent and I’m pretty sure he skipped off his face and so we skipped a couple of times before he finally knows dive like a submarine in his shorts were about a hundred yards behind this [inaudible] I didn’t feel the pain as much as he did. It hurt, but I had Braun and John’s, I never let it go. I cerated jaws. Yup. It’s a spinach. If you would have had them. Yeah. You would have still been on there today. He didn’t know about them. Yeah, it was a, it was a pro proprietary secret. Sounds like a personal problem.
Hey, do you remember tubing with dad and you had braces and that you got hit about four and I bet you he put dad hit about four bumps in the road. I had row. I had, I had to read the jaws in my mouth. Yeah. And literally I had braces, bite marks all down my arm and I was bleeding. I was like, what? The insurance hit me with his face over and over like cerated jaws. I have scars in my elbow still. They don’t let go. What was he on top of you as well? You don’t wear the name Purana jaws came from, was that from that moment? 1975 1975 when I bit my brother’s arm with my cerated jaws in my mouth.
It was the first time we had to go to the hospital and they didn’t know what to do because they never seen such a vicious attended. Charles attack in the freshwater Lake was mind blowing. It was like the movie. It was hypnotic Lake Placid. Superfly flied like a boat. I remember that one time at Penn. Was it? Nope. They did not have. You don’t want us to write to job at band camp. That’s a horror story, dude. Dude. Dude, dude, dude, this sounds like a bad tuba. That was a bad tuba. Sound like a Foghorn. I’d like to tuba meet you. Oh Hmm. Weird.
No, but we me and you think it’s being you meeting? You did. Hey, we tried to do that. Cross over. Oh yeah. Nicole. I got the guillotine by the story to jaws right in my neck and almost cut my juggler in half. I’ve seen it. I was out for the rest of the day. Hey, do you remember this? Oh, should we mention his names? Can we mention names? If they’re in this room, we can. Okay. Uh, do we use a brain? And there’s a guy in her own neighborhood named Brandon, kind of, his name is Brandon. He used to race cars. Do you remember this guy? Okay, this is a good story. And so I was a little, I was a little punk, a little diva when I was little because I was hanging out with Tiffany, our sister [inaudible] cool and joy. I had to be the purple cow.
I had no step up, make my presence known. So anyways, this guy, we went to the Lake with us and uh, probably every 10 minutes he looked at us, his little watch, a little digital analog thing. He goes, Tom’s up. It was a Casio, it was a little Casio calculator. He was like, switch kneeboarders or whatnot, switch it. So I was, I was about, I don’t know, 10 years old. And this was before I knew what, uh, I guess aggravated was. And so he was in front of me. He had the short line, I call it kind of like that long bus and short bus. He had the short bus line has a real short and so he fell off on the, on the kneeboard. Guess what I did, you ramped it. I saw an opportunity, Brandon and I went over and put my weight in the back.
So pick you know, do the front up a little bit cause I didn’t want to be no such a Nope. Too rude and I hit his head when he bumped up, I hit his head and I got like two feet in the air. True story. You know what’s cool about those old kneeboards that had those fins in the bottom and they cut the rain. We took the fins out because they couldn’t quite control it like you really want them to. And we took the fins out, puts aerated jars cause you can use them for literally anything. Put Zaretta jaws in there and he was able to cut left and right way faster. Yeah. And so whenever Brandon, that one neighbor kid fell in the water, he was able to Dodge from way outside the week. Come inside full blast in ramp is ed was I bullseye? Bobby, luckily boss rated jaws missed him.
[inaudible]
is precision work, but everybody cheered. That’s all that matters. 10 store. Ooh, there’s a crowd crowd cheering a crowd in my head.
Woo. So that happened.
All right, next word. I think Australia, I mean when you have, when you look about all the memories in your life and serrated jaws were involved
[inaudible]
you won and all those memories then. Yeah, I believe it. Have you seen it? Brandon st it. All right. Brandon, you ready? Word. Word of the day. Is Brandon picking it or we are. Oh, you can pick it or Brandon can pick it. Great. Wait, who do you got? Brand. Brand big. The word. Just anywhere. Yeah. Any word and name a name. Have that any word and name and name. Yeah, mere NACE that tell a story. There’s only three of us in the room. We can call you. You can call yourself. I believe Jordan’s got a lot of stories. Let’s see here.
Dog. Dog. Wow.
Like dog or D? A? W. G or D? O. G? No. Do you remember that? Speaking of MDA. WG. Do you remember that one video that we made when you’re in high school? Yup. Not Nate dog. Yup. Now proud of it. And when I didn’t have [inaudible] job, he was a loser. I was green, I was breakdancing. It was spinning my head. I say, you wouldn’t be like me. You can’t pee like me. And I do this pee move on my head. It’s bare sing. It’s out there. I’m pretty sure I have it on this computer right here. I mean, Lacey laughed about it though the night. Oh. And my hair. It looked like it. Like he just came. He just came from adjustment. Just came on, insert that or Justin Timberlake concert from dumb and dumber. Both. I hadn’t, it was a combo. I had a bowl cut, looked permed.
Bolton clit. It’s hard at French tips. Not everybody can achieve that look. No, I believe that and takes some special attention. But the whole, the whole moral of the story. I didn’t have Serrated Jaws in my life. He didn’t. I was lost. But now I’m found, one of the things I remember he said a N E D, I don’t know whether this is called Brandon cause I’m not hip. Right. He, he wipes off his shoulder like there’s something on the shoulder. I’m not, I don’t know if that’s called a move that’s called something like the floss or whatever. They wives’ off his shoulder and he said that’s how I roll. Do you know what that’s called? Is that, is that like a, is that like a move was like two, three or four years old maybe. How does know, Oh this is like, no. Brent is a high school. You did this way back then. Yeah, there’s tons of five. I was like, I told you that. I think I did. I think someone saw that on YouTube and they started using it. Dude, I did invent that. Thank you dude. And, and I was doing the Cupid shuffle before it was over before Cupid shuffle was this dance ever.
Yeah.
Do you know how they made the Cupid shuffle is by accident? Did you, so they had the beats, right. But the beats were so loud, so much bass, cause it’s a balloon boom song and the keyboard and all the beats would fall off. Right. Boom, boom. So it always just messed up. Well anyways, they ordered a set of art Serrated Jaws online to hold the keyboards in place and they actually was able to keep all the beats and that’s how they made the Cupid shuffle. So it’s, it’s worldwide to the left to the left. Oh, not shake it out now y’all. Yeah, that was my favorite. So the Bronto jaws don’t shake it out. NIO Hey bite. It’s ready to go. I remember I’d tried to do my hair like vanilla ice back in the day. I’ve tried real hard. So what, what kind of, what does that look look like? What a prevented you from achieving that? What? What does vanilla ice look like? W w what does his hair look like? This, this was way back. This is like pre gel or post this swoop. You kinda like the Zack Morris. Look, I don’t remember him back at the big cell phone. Yeah,
go on. Oh, I know. So a success. So did you uh, get a Ricky Bobby instead? Nope, I just gave up. But that was before you had Serrated Jaws, you were a quitter before SRE. Joss? Yes. Oh, are you? What, are you a quitter now? No. Why not older and wiser? An aspirated dose. Okay. I was going to say, I’m going to have to ask you that question one more time. You know, in the last year, probably two years,
Brandon has like blossom, like the TV show blossom. Yeah. He used to watch it, didn’t you? He did. Yeah. Are you proud of it? That was definitely before you had a beard. What else? What else did you watch? Brandon? The Simpsons. I guarantee it. Oh this. And he watched a dada home alone. Married with children. I did watch that. Maybe children. How buddy? Yeah, 70 show. Well that’s a little, that’s a little newer than those. All the ones you were kind of home improvement, little pawn. If you watched married with children, home improvement. Yup. You’re a punk. He would, you know, cause married with children. And back then when we were younger, it wasn’t rated R it was kinda, it was kinda X, X rated and kinda cerated but you know, you can’t forget about say by the bill. Pay by the phone’s good. Mr bar Rangers. Belden Baldwin MacGyver pick Iver dude. Can you imagine what MacGyver could do with some Serrated Jaws like a stick of gum, right? Some fingernail Clippers. He could make a bomb. What could he do with some trader Joe’s? Brendan, just give me a scenario. Okay, I’m going to, I’m going to lay, I’m going to lay this out. He’s in the desert. No water, no food.
Okay.
And he’s got to get home and all he’s got is a pair of straight jaws. How does he get home? Just just tell me what that story looks like. Have you ever seen MacGruber? Definitely could use him to climb with climb sand dunes more than the desert strap too. I’m going to switch, I’m going to move this question over ne. So how, how would MacGruber go home in the desert with a pair of serrated jaws?
[inaudible]
you gotta be creative, creative, the desert. I mean what I mean, anything is possible with straighten jaws. It doesn’t matter. Just any does it, what timeframe? What year? Like how much time does he have?
Yeah,
you’ve got four hours before he’s dehydrated. What year? 2020 1988 well Harry, those are two different stories. 2020. I think he’s going to pull out his uh, Serrated Jaws and his iPhone and call nine one one. No, I’ve said it all he’s got is his steroid. John’s so naked. He’s got serrated jaws. So get some Serrated Jaws Okay. So go now being out in the desert though. Sorry. Those jobs would get hot. That’s true. So what you’re going to do, I think that’s how he makes the opposite. So he’s going to do, he has a spit into the sand, go let dry and so he’s so dehydrated. His spit has a little elastic polymer. Yup. And then he’s going to tie it around. This rate of Joel is like slippers. Right? And he’s going to go to the top of the stand dunes and ski all the way to safety cause he’s got the 15 inch serrated jaws. They’re not out yet.
Now. That’s how I made it. I liked that one. [inaudible] but for key word. Yeah. For anybody. Anybody. Oh, uh, you went to be mature. We’re not that mature in here. Okay. Oh, um, key word. Babylon. Oh, it just seemed something about Babylon. Do you want this story? Yes, it does. All right, Brandon. I know nothing but no, I’ve watched an old address. Change it. Okay. Let me change a word. Babylon Vive. Okay. No. What you’re talking about. No, I watched the old old episode as he leaves. What he leaves. Heelys yeah, like the shoes that have the little wheels on. They came up with Healey’s double wall. You know how they started manufacturing those things? I don’t know. Well, a friend of a friend told my friend B right? That they struggled with manufacturing. They couldn’t, they couldn’t hold on to the parks. They kept on throwing them out. Is this true? You’re be right. Not me. Is it? Because if he’s be right, I don’t want to be with them. They kept on throwing them. They couldn’t keep the parts in there. Oh yeah. No. You hear what I said? So they started searching. No, I said, if he’s be right, I don’t want to be wrong. I believe that because Jordan walked in today, so it’d be right. Don’t be wrong. The day somebody wrong, don’t be wrong. Stupid.
Yeah. Anyways, so they start searching for some type of work holding that would help them with their manufacturing processes. They came across this company [inaudible] USA M M M dash USA with the solution. I believe it. You know what it was? You know what the product was? Raided kind of x-ray did deputy 42 words, two words. [inaudible] yeah, that’s one of them. Jaws. That’s it.
They may, may, may maiming.
You got it, man. It’s ready to, John’s saved. They’re saved their whole company. I believe it. I mean, this is just hearsay. This is what I heard from my friend. Yeah.
It’s kind of biblical. You said testimonial as a testimony. I know. Hmm. That’s good. I feel it. Do you feel it? Do you want to, do you want to fill it?
I do. Amen. Brother.
I cut some bearing bronze today that brought good old memories. I thought you’re going to say brought tears to your eyes. One of them cried a little bit last time I cut this. I had to, I had to, I had to sacrifice part of my check to cover it. I believe it. Brandon, now we’ve already talked about this on the, on the podcast, but let’s just today cousin Brian bronze. This is kind of like a, what was the very first thing? Your flash from the past? Your dad taught me. Yeah, so let’s, do you want to let’s, I think we should do a, we did a dad attribute. Yeah, a couple of old stories. Okay. Yeah, we can do that. Brian has probably the best experience. Wait, Whoa. Boy did I have this one? Okay, wait, here it is. So before, no, before straight a Joel’s.
No, it is before. It’s ready to Johnson. This is a good one. So dad, now he had this little, let’s just say a five by five cubicle office and he would smoke it up like a hotbox in there and everybody in the shop knew when dad got back from his errands from deliverance Ray to jaws. Right. Cause we could start some on that hotbox getting hot high and that he would bring back simple Simon’s pizza. What did he not Brandon who hot Brandon bring back simple Simon’s pizza every day. And you know what he’d do? He’d eat one size of a large piece of pizza. Is this maybe two, maybe two pieces or is this about me? It’s about both of you. Or we get the Bible. It’s about, yeah, I’m going to say it and you guys correct me if I’m wrong cause I could be wrong.
I just remember from my, from my point of view, I was not, I was not on the front lines of this. And um, anyways, every time he would put his pizza is 18 pieces of pizza in the fridge. Slices. Yeah. Slices. And they would curl up like a potato chip. And everybody in the shop was starving because we work out in the country [inaudible] and he wouldn’t ever bring us pizza. True. Right. Occasionally, like very seldom, 18 slices of pizza every day in there. I’m not going to get pissed off, but you know, there’s times that dad would ask Brandon if he wanted pizza before we did. This is true. Like there’s times I’m walking off this and Brandon and dad’s, he Nicole and I’m out there, we’re making serrated jaws and I walk out there and I’m like, and I know, what are you hating? I’m not, there’s going to hate. It was, it was a little bit disappointing.
[inaudible]
that’s the truth though. Anyways, after years of this same occurs years, literally years of the same occurrence.
May I add,
I would always try to save it. I would put it in baggies for him because like you said, after all up after years after years of this happened and you’re like, yeah, if someone would just put the pizza in a baggie, you could last like at least another week at least another day. Titan. Brandon’s a little Creek, like a clean freak. That’s what he’s good at. I mean, you should see him clean slate and Jolene. Any looks to prevent any, prevents her Surry jealous from rusting. That’s true. And he was trying to prevent the pizza from turning into a potato chip. That’s just who he is. He can’t teach that. Anyways, one day.
Okay, let’s just bring it back like that. Another day. Dad would never eat his leftover pizza. Ever. Ever. Never, ever, ever. Never, ever, ever, rarely, never. Gonna get it. Never gun. Get it to a tailor stowed. Dang it. God. We had different songs in our head and uh, anyways, one day he decided, you know, I’m going to come back to work and I’m not going to get a pizza. I’m gonna eat my leftover pizza. May I add O B block? That’s what he said. He said, I’ll be back. And he came back. Where are you going to add something?
How are you going to say that? He craved it? The whole ride back from where you with? He said no, but no, no, no. But you felt it. I felt no, he felt he felt something anyways. He was so hungry and dreaming about this pizza on the way back. You know what I’m saying? You know when you get a light bulb and you’re like, I have leftover pizza and he’s getting he, he finally realized who created the light bulb. Picasso. A first light bulb was from Picasso. I don’t know if that’s true. That’s true. It’s not true. Oh, okay. It’s definitely not close. Nope.
Anyway, so he comes back, Brandon, and he wants that pizza. He’s gonna eat that pizza. Oh, that’s going pizza. Pizza. Pizza. What in the world happened to his pizza when he got back? I don’t know. Where did he can’t he open? He goes over the frigerator, opens that door. He’s, he’s like salivating right now. Salivate. Salivating. Elevated. No salivating. And he opens the door into his surprise disposal like it no. [inaudible] to his surprise, there’s no pizza there. What, what happened to his pizza? Brandon didn’t go home to my bed. Late gone. Yeah. Who was he talking to? NACE but did he call you into the office right away? Brandon. Did he call you into the office? Uh, not in the office. He called you into the back, he took you out back [inaudible] me and he said, Hey, did you eat my pizza? You fat ass.
And I, I just had this ghost of a look because I wasn’t ready for that. You know what I see, I see there’s two sides to every story. You were hungry. I was, yeah, because you were making Parana jaws all day without breaks. Kind of like child labor out here. I didn’t want it to go to waste. There’s starving people around the world. True. And you were just trying to prevent that food from going to waste like it had been for years and you didn’t know what he did know what he did that night. You may not know this story that night. Yeah. That night he went home, told Sherry about this story.
So he told my mama the story that night. Right. [inaudible] so he starts telling how somebody ate his pizza [inaudible] so he can’t, it’s kind of like the, do you ever seen like the, the ones that are red, the three, the three bears [inaudible] right where he comes home, somebody ate his Borge right. Anyways, he comes home and he tells mom about somebody eating his pizza. It was the baby one. He starts off there, I’m the baby. Oh yeah, I understand now. So it’s not nice. So it wasn’t nice because of Jordan. It was the middle one. It was what? Why does your voice go up so high? Oh, sorry. It wasn’t the middle one. He’s like, Hey, most Buddha fat ass, the big one, the big one, big one. Anyway, she said, she said, George, you can’t call him that. And you start laughing. [inaudible] you ever seen my dad laugh real hard? He goes, yeah, there’s no starts flaring. She said he’s been making cerated jaws all day. You can’t call him that. Anyways. He just thought, he just thought it was funny. He didn’t give him care. It’s a cold, prickly. And we have a notable quotable for that. Do you know what I’m thinking?
Yes. Leave people full of holes. Is that how it goes? Okay. How’s it go? Leave people feeling full, not full force. Oh bam. Bam. That’s, that’s the notable quotable. Braden, did you feel kind of Holy when he cerated jaw? Dear, but with that comment or do you know in my defense I went to town and got him lunch that day because he made you, I believe it that too. Yeah. But did you feel kind of Holy kinda like Swiss cheese man? It was, uh, you know, I’m, I’m, I’m happy that you had this relationship, but almost every time dad got pizza, he would ask be right if he wants something. And he never went to me and Jordan ask us for pizza. Like I was leftovers. Like a dog. The son he never had. Yeah, exactly. Or just go in there. He was the sock kind of clot. He called him a fat ass. This son that makes prawn and jaws. Oh, sorry. Did jaws yup. Both. And eats his pizza.
Okay.
I’m a little jelly. I’m not going to cry. Can we get something in your eye? Yup. Allergies.
[inaudible]
Brandon, you got a story? Oh yeah. Yeah. Give it to us about dad and straight to Josh. Let’s see. Okay. Um, the little Saul, something happened to it. Oh yeah, this is a good one. Hey. But like literally, you gotta be excited when you tell this story because this is a fantastic story about Serrated Jaws. And I know you don’t know this one. Oh my gosh. This one’s good. I live. Yup. Yup. Yup. When Brandon told me this, I laughed so hard. Did dad say a cuss word? Me? Yeah. You always hurt dad though. And that’s where he cut. That’s true. Every time. Braden, her dad, her smashed his finger, she stabbed his toe or cut dad. He’d always cuss her. Brayden.
That’s true. This is a true story, but uh, dealt. What happened? I screwed up. I went and grabbed him. Wait, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa, Whoa. You grabbed my dad where at one hand or two hand to front and back. I had serrated jaws for protection. I didn’t use protection. Oh, you already had that self defense class. Yeah. Had the rust preventative wrapper on it. Thank you. You got to prevent that rust a for sure. For sure. He meant show, but shout no, I’m meant for sure. No guys, I’m telling you it was for sure. Go on. Yeah, so do proceed. Um, something wasn’t working. He said, Hey, I need you back here. Right back there fiddling with it. That’s what she said. He said specific. So you, you picked my make sure it’s not plugged in and uh,
I didn’t unplug it. And what do you mean like, so you got to get all the info, the on and off. Is this a good one with the electric wires in the Saul? Okay. Everybody’s got to know what’s happening. Okay. Cause I thought he says Brandon, go turn this. First of all, let me just say if I was fiddling with the lead first of all, and I said, Brandon, go turn it off. NACE there’s a notable quotable that we live by. He’ll unplug it. No, wait, what? Go unplug it. What is mine and your notable quotable. Don’t be a dumb ass. No, that’s wrong. Oh, before we got, since we got [inaudible] jaws. Yeah. Okay. Trust but verify. Yes. Trust but verify. So that means pretend like you trust people and then don’t know, don’t trust people in check it verify. And so I would have went and verified that you unplugged it before. I’m glad you clarified that. It was had to do with wires. Electricity. Yeah, because I thought it was almost borderline inappropriate sex. Top two hands. He sent it back. He said I need you in the back. And he fiddled it. He filled it. And is it plugged in? Yeah. So I have no clue if, and I use the rust preventative. Exactly. Like that’s, yup. Okay, so electrical machine, not horizontal sexual misconduct? Yes. Um, what does that sexual harassment? Both.
Okay, go ahead. So you turned it on, you’d said George, I turned it off
[inaudible]
Oh plugged it.
Oh, okay. You unplugged it because he was, he was like gonna switch the on and off backwards. Right. But did you unplug it? No. Why not? Did you take out some type of life insurance policy on my father? No.
You want it, you were mad cause he called you a fat ass. You know, now thinking about it, maybe it was, maybe I wasn’t a little angry. I’m not sure. But I do know it had something to do with plug unplugging it. Yeah, I remember. And he went to, it’s not funny. [inaudible] he went to switch the switch upside down. He’s, and when he went to do that, what happened? It was shocked. Did he get electrocuted? He did. And then what did he say to you? I can’t remember. I know he basically said get over here. And you flipped the switch. He did. You had a shark to say go grab some burrata and jaws and you’ve lived the Swiss jaws. They were cutting the first already jaws and then a little salt. That’s right. He said, he said get the braided John’s paraded, get this ready to John’s. And you flipped the switch.
I believe it.
Brandon, did you, were you made enough to do that? What? You’re breaking up. What’d you say? Where are you man enough to do that? Yes. What? Flipped the switch after you turn a plugged it? Nope. Why not? Cause it looked painful.
Oh man.
So what’s another story that we have about dad? Did that shut down the production of Schrader Johnson that day? For that day? Yes. So anybody that hasn’t got their serrated jaws in that timeframe, that was because of Brandon [inaudible] B. Right? Cause he would be wrong that day. It was me wrong. That’s right. Yep. You don’t want to be right. Be wrong.
So what’s another story about that new? I remember, I don’t know brain was a part of this, but you know who else was our oldest member at mass machine? I know who it is. Dell. Oh, okay. So his son [inaudible] yeah, I have a couple of stories about his son, but this one, the shop was closed down, right? Yeah. Dad had that a big four by four red truck. Yes. Everything was shut down cause we live in a small town and so we had about two feet of snow this winter. Oh. Everything was shut down. He had those big KC lights. Oh, big borough bar. The Chrome roll bar. Peg. Keep going on. I just want to say pesticides.
The big brush guard on the front bill. That’s a big paint. He had 32 inch tire 30 no, he had 33 he had, he had the who’s mud tires before they were mud tires. Those are small now. Oh they are the back then. You know what he did? Brandon? He tied a rope to his bumper and put the water tube behind it and he drove all through Bixby with me and Jordan and Brett holding on. Let’s write a Joel’s through downtown Bixby. You remember that story? Yeah. We were holding on lights ready to Jones. We were, but we’re, the latest was completely illegal. There is no cops. They can’t get out cause we Bixby never got more than two feet of snow but data two inches. Yup. And so dad had the biggest truck back then. Oh Hey dad. The biggest truck, big truck, four by four diesel engine. It was not diesel sounded more flavorful. It did something good. Okay. You can’t say gasoline.
[inaudible]
okay. I like it. Okay. But he did that and we, if we didn’t hold on like cerated Joel’s,
we wouldn’t be here cause he tried to kill us and he’s like stronger. Like the heat tree. Do we have on our Serrated Jaws, it was like the Lake all over again. Brandon. Yeah, he got that look in his eyes. But this was on snow, right on the street with frozen, our main streets. Every road. All the way from here to Tallahassee. Yes. But for real like pass symbol Simons, we took every route as best Brett, it’s like two miles away. Every road from here. What we’re going guys on when those inner tubes, the tube behind dad’s CEO’s port Casey truck. I did not pop cause it’s snow. It’s not asphalt. I don’t know. I had a good car. I know me too. Something like that in my head. I could’ve said something real quick. Yeah, I got it. It’s not an asphalt.
So who did hit you like three jobs on the forehead but um, no he did that. Dad did that. Okay. So Bri bringing up this every time there’s been snow. We’ve done stupid stuff cause you know there was one time I believe I got on the four Wheeler, you almost kill me. Won’t get there in time. We’ll get there in time. And you and our cousin got that in or too bad again. God bless. Broken road. And I was pulling you guys down the country road, not asphalt. It was actually a gravel, but it was no both. Now I didn’t realize that when you turn 90 degrees and someone’s behind you and their philosophy goes to like 400 miles per hour. Yes. Yep. And when there’s a stop sign [inaudible] that stuff could happen. Been there. What happened? Hey, where are you hanging out? Did you have your Sharita John’s that day I did. And then I flipped him off. You, so the story of both of them do like a spider monkey just shot him.
I felt so bad. I thought I was a little bit like, I almost killed my brother. So Jordan has, dad had 33 his right to Troy. He gets out the Jeep, he puts 30 fours on there. It feels like a bad ass. Right? And so he’s pulling everybody. Who was it on the Jeep? It was on the Jeep. Oh, I thought it was a four letter. No, as Jesus. Not like a four Wheeler. And so he feels like a bad ass pregnant. He pulls us just like dad. Did he say, I’m going to be like dad, but let’s go in the country. Right. We don’t know where the street signs or nothing like that own tree. And so right here down the Hill we’re in grandma’s. I hit something that flips me over elk over. Anyway, it was a, it was a stop sign. So my rain into it.
So it’s bitten half and it’s like a spear. Oh and I was two feet away from just getting severe chest kebab. Yup. No, I mean partially technically yes. But I kind of have it on cruise control so I it was kinda like Tesla driving it. So you remember that the w with a big Tom we went in the back. Yeah we did all that. It was like that. But with water tubes behind every car in the streets on this. Yep. So I flipped the prawn, draws at him, straight a jaws. I said, I said show yourself. He drove off. You did, you drove off yourself? I did. I actually just cut the tube in the rope and left it there and I drove home. I was, I can’t say pissed cause mom might hear this. Paul was about to, I was upset. I was upset yet. So what else? What’s another good story about the hen? Well, that one was technically about us.
Oh Hmm. I remember a good one. Let’s see.
Well, I remember maybe an inappropriate one with the, uh, was it the sky coaster?
Okay.
Inappropriate. Yeah. No bro. Britt, can you say anything on this? Can you sit well, I reminded you. You can say it. Okay. I don’t want to set pissed off earlier, but I didn’t say pissed off. You know why? You know, why? Cause this is appropriate. And mom might hear this, so go on. Oh, me, go on. Yeah. Do you know what state we’re in? Yep. Missouri. It do, what is there? Sorry, what did I say? [inaudible] something like that. We were in Branson, Missouri was me. You are sister, mom. And one of our best friends, unfortunately not be right.
Hmm.
Well, no, it was Johnny. Oh yeah. Yeah. And I’m sure there’s this thing called the sky coaster. It might still be there at the track. There’s multiple tracks now. It’s probably, but as a track, it’s called the, it’s a, it’s a go kart racing facility. And we’d go there every night and we’d get kicked out. True. Partially because our prawn jaws were so aggressive. Cerenia jaws were so aggressive. And um, this night we got kicked out. So we went to the sky coaster. The sky coaster is this big triangle, massive triangle, and they pull you backwards. You’re, you’re in a vest laying down and they pull you backwards, right? He pull you all the way up, but I don’t even know how high it is. Super high. And then three people were in this vest facing their head straight to the ground and the a D there’s a person on the right that has to actually pull the rip cord. Right. What does the ripcord usually do? Brandon breaks Brit. Anyways, there’s red cord. Basically when you pull it, you go flying straight towards the concrete and then at the last possible second you go walk in, shoot straight up into the air, right? So it’s kind of like a pendulum with people attached to it. Sounds horrible.
So, uh, my dad, my sister and Johnny, right? [inaudible] we’re attached to this now. This was referred before people knew about prawn and John’s buffer. Buffer B for her. The first before people knew about Pronto. Joss. Right. [inaudible] nice. Do you remember what happened whenever they reached the peak and then they were about to go backwards? Backwards? Yep. What’d I do? Well, their harness was tightened together. Like threaded Jarls yeah, it held on. It did hold it hold the home to the people. I won’t say who, but there was somebody in that group, there was some person in that group that their teeth did not handle the Perona Serrated Jaws fixture, the serrated jaws. And they flew out like a bullet, like a bolt of lightning. And they leaned it about a mile away from us. No, they actually landed in, no, the actually landed inside the light, the perimeter that they have marked off.
Right. And there was somebody in that group of three people that said, sir, you know, they said, sir, could you hand me those? And so they went down there to pick it up cause they didn’t know what it was. They got like two inches away and they freaked out because they saw what it was. This is, there’s a VHS video cost. 60 bucks. It probably did, but if you would’ve had serrated jaws holding on to those teeth or she, if she would’ve or he would’ve had his red jaws is unbelievable. They flew out. They were free. I’m free. What does it, Brendan, what I, Hey, I’ve read it fall then I’ve been there. You’ve been free-falling before situation. Yes. Keith has free fellow at the Illinois river. Tell him, tell him how it is when you’re surveying. What? I’m going to bring it up. You’re going to tee it up. I’m going to tee it up. And then brands bring it down to the bottom. T T T gone. Teagan. That’s a new, that’s a new golf, new golf lingo. Oh yeah, get off this weekend. I’ll say why not? I hope so. What? The American putters? Yes. From American putter company. Yes. God made by an American company. Oh, look at the weather in America.
So over at a NASA machine, we like to be like, what would you like to hang out with families or families during the summer? Hang out with families, your family, anybody’s family. Just call us up. Okay. So we’d like to hang out with our families and we’d like to go to the river usually during the summer and uh, yeah, not. And during this summer, this trip, we were having the best time. It was last summer. Yeah. 2019. And we had our camping tip or camps all set up. Right. I’m just going to trust everything you said was accurate right now. And so could, we had two tents. We did have two, two tents and we are doing, we set up like at nine in the morning. Right. We know when out we’re having the best time throwing Frisbees, footballs, cooking on the river. We have, we brought a, uh, a charcoal grill down the river and they thought we were crazy.
We did it. And uh, and we made the best broads. Oh, in the modular, at Serrated Jaws. We’re holding our grill up, right? Oh yeah. They were. So jaws actually made, made cooking with the grill pump. It was possible. We had the best speaker. We did have. We did, yes, we played the best songs. True. So we’re having a best time drinking lots of water. Lots of river water. Yeah. And uh, it was natural spring water, I believe it. And during those time, probably like three months ahead of time, there’s a big flood, a lot of rain, lot of flood. And they said if you see any floating logs, don’t go on them. And so during this particular trip we have about five smart grown men and we see a floating law.
And what would you do with a floating log? Flush it. Okay. So we’re smart, right? Brandon pretty. We’re pretty smart. So we’re going to go and try to see how many men we can get on this law because it just flooded. There’s currents and we had a lot of water in our bodies. So we’re in it. See if we grab on this floating and there was really good music playing [inaudible] music about straighter jaws, I believe it. There was this log pointing upwards. So it was kind of going down from the river up. So there’s only just a piece of the top showing it was pointed downstream. Yup. Not only was it slicker and snuck, saw the Moss on it. The current was flowing hard, hard, hard. It was going and we thought, you know what? Nope, we’re men. We’re men. Lay men or [inaudible] were mighty men.
Only men that use Sareda jaws. Yeah, I was on the sidelines. I was like, that looks like [inaudible] and so he was a soap. Stupid. I’m going to go do it cause me and cause me and NACE liked to start the party. Yeah, we ran out there. I jumped on. Then he jumped on, knocked me off. Well we didn’t just run out in the Reese. It was like kind of swam out there and screamed. There’s a lot of screaming and so men, yeah, sounded like a war. It was a war. And then I finally made it back, jumped on, knocked him off and he got on right then Brandon. But when you get [inaudible] you literally about a quarter of a mile away cause the current, you gotta run by it. If you don’t make the, if you don’t swim to the side within like 20 seconds, you’re gone. Yeah. You know what the problem was?
We didn’t have three to John’s not with us that we’re trying to grab onto the [inaudible] of [inaudible] cause Brandon said they rust it. They didn’t have the Russ prevented. No, cause they didn’t have Russ preventative on them. You guys were semi jealous cause I had a big bulge and went pants cause there the straight Joe and you said take those out. That’s not fair. That’s what I heard. And then I almost died trying to cook a tree. He was literally, I was scared. He was almost about to cry. I said NACE don’t cause a scene. Just take them out of your pants. Yeah. Yeah. Take this are rated jaws outta here. But I had bigger plans that day.